SAVING AN YEAR OUT

Year out is the worst punishment a student can get in his campus life.So every student tries his/her best to avoid it but unfortunately some do get year outs & some survives inspite of being the front runners .You can put me in the latter category.I have been one of the front runners for an year out in almost all semesters yet somehow i got through. For those seeking my advice here's some tips for you.But before that let me explain to you about the real hazards of being an year out (explained to me by the experienced guys, the masters we call them).

1.You lose an year,everyone knows it but the masters say that the true worth of an year will be known to us after sometime (trust me when i say the masters can not be wrong, not in this matter) .
2.You will become the most infamous person of your
campus in no time.
3.You will be viewed as a filthy creature by all the geeks (this is not such a problem,who cares about those f**kin geeks).
4.Even guys with washout badges tries to console you
5.All your friends will be promoted and as you think sitting with your juniors is a disgrace you have only 2 options left
a)be prepared to receive another year out or
b)stop the course

Now as the terror of the situation is clear to you lets discuss how to avoid it

The simplest solution is to attend classes 'regularly', but if you were capable of such a deed you wont be reading this crap and moreover its the geeks style of doing things so forget it.
Lets do it our style
step1. Try to attend classes at the beginning of a semester (This is extremely tough as it questions our international motto's "why do things early when you can do it later"& "the later the better") but its better than geeks way & worth a try.
step2.Those who tried to implement step1 will come to the realization that its an impossible task such persons are ready to go to step2
ie to attend the mid semester classes ,this is tougher but the demand to attend classes has increased . This is a very important stage as you will come to face some ultimate truths in life ,here are some
a)You cannot learn a subject without knowing the basics
b)You cannot concentrate more than 5 min (5 min is the maximum 1 min at the start ,1 min at the end and 3 while taking attendance)
and the most important of all
c)Day dreaming,sleeping while your eyes are open.. such deeds are not myths by any means.
step 3.Try attending classes at the end .Come on guys you must have understood by now that you cant attend classes and even if you try your maximum you wont make it, so better dont bother .

Now we understand that attending classes is not a solution, we go to plan b.

Going to the teachers for attendance :
You will go to your teachers probably with a fake medical report and a bunch of solid lies.But these preparation will become worthless as you wont be given a single chance to open your mouth .Be prepared for a rapid fire round ,the questions will fly from all direction,what was the disease ??...who was dead??..... the questions just keep coming and all your well prepared lies will be shattered , that's when you come to know that your teachers are much smarter than your anticipation.
You will answer the questions in the most pleasant manner hoping they will help you ,again you will be disappointed .Some teachers will be open enough to tell they are sorry but some will do it the hard way .They will tell you about their helplessness, they have already submitted the attendance sheet to the staff coordinator bla..bla..bla.., bull shit why cant they tell that they cant help .

Next you will take a trip through your campus .
First of all you will go to the staff coordinator he will tell you to meet the respected teachers .so you will again meet the teachers and get the same response from them, then you will try to meet the coordinator but for your disappointment you will find out that your staff adviser is a superhero , he can travel at the rate of knots.At one moment he is at siberia ,at the next moment he is at doe & the very next moment he is at his home .This procedure goes on for a while then you will realize that there is no point in running behind the superhero he is beyond you.All the running around is just a waste of time .

Everything in your power has been done what now ? you trust ,you trust completely on your staff adviser .You will leave your future in his hands and just pray .If he is kind enough he will give you a condonation.Those who don't receive the condonation,they are the unlucky ones who gets the year out .The lucky ones will get the experience of their life time .They are the ones who describes engineering as an adventure ,an adventure ie worth four years (or more) of their life.At the climax of the adventure all the lucky ones will experience the most awesome feeling of their lifetime .The feeling that will never be experienced by any geeks ,the most addictive of all feelings .The want for this feeling leads you to same situations again &again (i must find an excuse for our repeated attendance shortage).I wish i could name the feeling but i cant because its so heavenly and its beyond me .
For geeks who are reading this try to experience this feeling you wont be disappointed.(I wish you guys are foolish enough to believe me)

P.S. I have come to realize that s7 is coming to an end and im yet again going to exercise everything mentioned above. Those who have better tips please share with me.